I did [at 2.45am this morning]. Let me fill you in on how I got to that point...
A little bit of background: I have four girls [Miss 7, Miss 5, Miss almost-3 and Miss 0 who is 8 months] and a wonderful husband [Mr E]. Three months ago we moved 400km away from our home to a new town. Life is never dull. The move and the baby is the reason I've been so quiet on my blog.
We went away for the Easter break, had a much-needed holiday, and decided to leave our return to the VERY LAST POSSIBLE MOMENT. So we got in at 8.20pm on Sunday night. Monday [yesterday] was a pupil-free day, so the kids had an extra day of holiday and Miss 7's birthday party was scheduled for the afternoon.
Mr E and I ran around like mad getting organised for said party. It would be accurate to say we were a little perterbed when a couple of guests arrived before 2pm, when the party was to start at 2.30pm. By 2.10 ALL of the guests had arrived and after careful questioning of the parents who were dropping their children off, we realised I had put the wrong time on the invitations. This shows you just how tired and in need of a holiday I was, for I put 2.00-4.30pm on the invitations instead of 2.30-4.00pm. A simple error, yes. But monumental. Who holds a 2 1/2 hour kids party at their home? NOT US. An hour and a half, tops. Always.
The party went well, as kids of age 7 or 8 seem to be keen to repeat the same game over and over again in the hope that this time they will win a prize. So we eventually got them all home, bathed and fed our family, and put them to bed. Miss 7 needed cupcakes to take to school to celebrate her birthday with them so I had to start baking... 60 of them. Yes, there are 56 students and 3 teachers and one teacher aide.
The baking wasn't such an issue, as I talked on the phone to my sister throughout the exercise, which meant it was quite enjoyable and productive. I did burn my finger though, as I was so distracted talking to her I forgot which tray had just come out of the oven and tried to pick it up instead of the cool one!
After deciding that only a minimal clean up of the kitchen was necessary at 11pm, I headed for bed. Miss 0 was sounding a bit snuffly, and by the time I had just lay down and closed my eyes, she started crying for the poor thing couldn't breathe. So for the next hour and a half I rubbed euky bear rub on her chest, sat her upright, gave her medicine, and did what mothers do when their baby is sick. Finally she settled between half past twelve and 1am. As I was putting her in her cot, Miss 2 woke, crying, for she had croup and a huge fever. I brought her out to the lounge [so as not to wake everyone] and sat up with her and did what mothers do when their child is sick. We dozed fitfully until about 2 am when her croup passed and fever broke and she asked to go back to her own bed.
What a relief! I was exhausted and needed to lie down. I reached down to pick up the cup she'd been drinking from, and found a glass beside the couch I didn't know was there. Best to pick it up too, I thought, so Miss 0 doesn't find it before me in the morning [she loves crawling around exploring]. So I picked up the plastic cup, the glass and Miss 2 and walked over to the bench to put the glass down. Somehow in my tired state in the dark I managed to completely miss the bench and dropped the glass on the tiles. Of course it smashed.
So here I am, barefoot, holding Miss 2, in the dark nowhere near a light switch. And I think to myself "well you either have to cry or laugh at this ridiculous situation you've gotten yourself into". Realising that to yell out to try to wake Mr E would only result in waking the girls, not him, I sat Miss 2 and the cup on the bench [being more careful this time] then climbed up myself, trying not to stand on any glass that I couldn't see.
I climbed into the next room, took Miss 2 to bed and considered what to do now: I am so tired I need to just go to bed and deal with it in the morning; but chances are I won't be the first one up and one of the girls will walk in and stand on the glass. Of course that is not an option so at 2am I started cleaning up. By 2.30 I had swept, mopped and was considering whether to vacuum the carpet as some glass shards had reached there when Miss 5 came out to tell me her throat was sore and she felt sick. So I gave her some medicine and cuddles and patted her back to sleep.
Then I barricaded the room with chairs, taped up a big sign on the chairs that said "NO ONE IS TO ENTER THIS ROOM UNTIL IT HAS BEEN VACUUMED. A glass was broken in here overnight." When I found a piece of glass in the kitchen as I walked back towards my bed, I considered whether it was an abberration, or whether there could be more glass in there. Not being able to take the risk, I proceeded to quickly mop there too.
In the silence of my quiet house at 2.45am I wondered whether to go to bed at all. Then I thought a better idea would be for Miss 7 to get sick so I didn't have to leave the house in the morning. Four sick children when I am so tired would be easier to deal with than having to get 2 or 3 sick kids in the car to take the last one to school. So yes, I wished she would get sick.
Then I looked on the table at the 60+ cupcakes sitting there. No, even if she is sick in the morning, Miss 7 would go to school!! I didn't go to all that effort to have to repeat it again another day. So at 2.46am I withdrew my wish for illness to befall my eldest offspring and prayed she would stay well.